When two Neolithic hunter-gatherer friends (Jack Black and Michael Cera) are banished from their primitive village, they find themselves on a journey around the ancient world, where they encounter adventures and people of Biblical pedigree. Also with David Cross, Paul Rudd, Hank Azaria and Christopher Mintz-Plasse. Directed by Harold Ramis. [1:40]
SEX/NUDITY 8 - A large orgy is shown on screen: over 50 people are shown engaging in sexual acts, passionately rubbing against one another, laying on one another, groping and kissing, as half-dressed people are shown walking about the room.
► Two people are shown in a passionate embrace, kissing then falling to the ground, off screen, and sexual moans are heard, as well as the man asking if he should remove his underclothing; the two emerge later and announce that they had just had intercourse and that it was enjoyable and they would like to have intercourse again.
► A man instructs a woman that they should kiss with their mouths open. A man erotically licks the face of a woman. A woman is shown licking the face and ear of another woman. A man and a woman are shown in a passionate embrace, kissing. A man and a woman are shown kissing passionately. A man and woman dance together suggestively.
► Two men are shown lying in the same bed, after a man offers that they can "lay" with one another. A shirtless man demands that a young man pour oil on his body and rub it in with his hands and genitals; the young man pours oil on his chest and rubs his chest with his hand as the man moans and makes sexual and suggestive comments. A man states that he has sex with animals and is later shown trying to have sex with an animal.
► A statue is shown bearing an exaggeratedly large erection, a man closely inspects the statue, places his hand on the erection, accidentally snaps off the statue's genitals and then tries to hide the broken parts.
► A woman is shown running her hands up and down two spears in a purposefully suggestive fashion, which two men discuss as being blatantly sexual in nature. A woman leans over, her cleavage exposed, and two men are shown ogling her breasts. Men and women look at one another in a very suggestive manner. A man looks at a young man and licks his lips suggestively. A man stands before a woman with his leg up, and it is implied that the woman can see his genitals and she smiles. A woman is shown erotically eating and licking a banana and two men talk about the sexual nature of her eating the banana and a man tries to imitate her by erotically eating a chunk of meat.
► A man jokes about incest, saying that it was awkward the morning after he had sexual intercourse with his mother, so he would not have sexual intercourse with his sister. A woman is asked how she can be "had." A man offers his daughter for sex, saying that people need to be fruitful and multiply. A man tells a woman that he wants to have sex with her and makes two crude references to erections. A woman rebukes a man's advances for sex, saying instead that she is sexually interested in women and that she is a practicing lesbian. A man is told, "sodomize this" and is pushed into a rioting crowd. A man speaks in a suggestive manner to a young man, stating that he would like to see the man perform sexual acts. A man says he just received a "rub and scrub." A young man discusses how his body was painted by another man, with a focus on his genitals. The phrase "where sinners are winners" is used after a discussion of free sex, orgies, and over-consumption of alcohol, including a remark that any ill behavior that takes place will not be discussed once leaving the city. People discuss prostitution and the practice of sodomy, encouraging participation in open sex (both homosexual and heterosexual) orgies, and sexually transmitted diseases. People discuss how virgins are pure of sexual mark, and a man talks about being a virgin himself. A man introduces himself as a eunuch and explains the process of how he became a eunuch, including retaining a portion of his male genitalia which he keeps in a pouch. A man is shown with hair on his hands and mentions that the hair was pubic hair as well as chest hair from giving another man a massage with oil. A man mentions that he had just had a "long, wet, hot" bath with another man. People discuss a fertility dance and how it would be an excellent opportunity to dance with a person who they are sexually interested in (the dance is never shown on screen). Two men discuss "laying" with a woman, implying having sexual intercourse. A man advises another man that he can simply hit a woman over the head and then drag her back to his house to have sex with her, even if she shows no interest in doing so, and then adds that women like it that way. A man says he does not want to wake up his parents while having loud intercourse. Men repeatedly speak of "lying with" women meaning intercourse, and a person asks where babies come from. A man makes a crude reference to masturbation. A man tells another man that he would be happy if the man produced many children with his sister. A man says that he will use his "short spear" to "straighten out" a group of men (while he means this as a violent threat, the implication of his speech is sexual). A man discusses how he will perform circumcision on three other men, he explains in detail the actions required to perform circumcision, including crude and vulgar terms for parts of the male genitalia. People discuss, at length, circumcision and the sexual implications of circumcision, including making crude references to the act of circumcision and male genitalia and the appearance of male genitalia after circumcision.
► When being attacked by a snake, a man is instructed to stick a finger in its "hole" (the man does not do so). A man holds up the cooked carcass of an animal and asks a question implying that the carcass resembles the nude female figure. A man offers to kiss another man.
► Women are shown wearing low-cut tops, shirts which expose bare mid-drift, and short skirts.
VIOLENCE/GORE 7 - A verbal argument between two men escalates to a shoving match, the two men are then shown punching one another in the face, and then wrestling on the ground; one man strikes the other man repeatedly on the head with a large rock (the blows accompanied by a loud noise and the man's forehead is bloodied), the aggressor stops believing he has killed the man, continues beating him when he realizes he is still alive, and with a violent series of final blows, the man is shown, with a bloody forehead, laying dead on the ground (the body is shown buried under a pile of straw).
► A man is shown being struck in the back with an arrow and his body falls face-forward to the ground. A person is shown being decapitated and their head is shown flying off the body and rolling across the ground.
► Violent combat is shown with people wielding swords (no blood is shown, but we hear the sounds of people being struck with swords and staffs, and their bodies are shown being thrown to the ground; two deaths are shown). A riot breaks out in a crowded square, people begin to punch one another, stab with swords, wrestle, and kill and maim people surrounding them (no blood is shown, however the sound of punching and shouts of pain and anger are heard); a man is hit in the head with a rock, oil is thrown on a person's clothing and they are pushed into an open flame, which engulfs them and a man is shown wrestling, stabbing, and punching his way through a crowd of attackers.
► A spear is shown being thrown into a man's back, the impact is shown and the spear sticks straight out of the man's back, there's no blood and the man appears to be fine after the spear is removed. Two men are shown in shackles on a stage, surrounded by people who are instructed that the two men are to be executed by stoning; large baskets of stones are revealed, people grab for the stones eager to throw them, and a young boy throws three stones, hitting the head of one of the men. A man accidentally kicks a woman in the stomach and she doubles over in pain, then he punches her in the face and she falls to the ground.
► A man is shown placing a person on an altar, stating that he was soon going to sacrifice the person and holding a large knife over the person's head; he then drops the knife and a slicing sound is heard, implying that he had stabbed his own foot. A man is shown, in a rage, kicking and punching four people off of a stage; they are thrown to the ground with a thud. A person is struck on the head with a thwack and falls to the ground. A man is struck on the head with a large stick. A man uses a large whip to beat a man into submission and after several loud strikes, knocks the man to the ground. A man strikes a woman over the head with a stick; she takes the stick from the man and hits him on the head multiple times until he runs away. A man is struck on the head with a large object and drops to the ground. A bolt of lightning is shown striking a man in the forehead, throwing him to the ground and leaving a bright red mark and smoke is shown rising from the center of the enflamed tissue, but the man insists that he feels fine.
► A severed animal's head is thrown on the lap of a woman and the open neck wound is shown. Two men are shown chained to the wall of a prison cell, rats crawl on the floor and one man is shown chained upside down.
► A man accidentally sets a small hut on fire while swinging a burning stick around, this prompts a small riot, the man runs away, with people chasing him, he slips, falls and slides down a small hill with a moan. People are shown being thrown into an altar with an open fire and the fire engulfs the altar after the body is thrown in.
► A loud series of screams and shouts are heard in the distance, after a lengthy discussion of how to perform circumcision. Two men are forced to bend over a table, as a man prepares to sodomize them with a stick, but are interrupted before anything happens. A man twists the nipples of another man. A man is shoved to the ground. A man violently grabs the arm of a woman, causing her to drop a large plate, he raises his hand to strike her, but is stopped. A man is struck in the shoulder by what is assumed to be the preserved and severed testicles of another man. A man jokingly rolls around with a corpse, pretending that the person is not dead (the dead body is then buried).
► A man is shown being thrown off a tall building screaming and he hits the ground. A man is lifted up by a group of men and carried away on their shoulders. Soldiers hurriedly carry two men away.
► A cougar growls ferociously, leaps from a tree to attack a man with a growl and the man is shown later with scratches all over his arms and legs, and confirms that the scratches are painful. A snake is shown slowly wrapping its way around the body of a man, who grows increasingly panicked, but the man is able to free himself; he is advised to eat the snake before it is able to eat him. Two people discuss how a pack of wild dogs savagely killed a person's parent and one of the people pantomimes a dog howling and ripping through a person's flesh.
► A person threatens to kill another person, "where they stand" in several scenes. A man threatens to kill another man in a savage fashion. A man is told he will be "struck dead" if he performs a certain action, saying that "instant death" will come to him. People discuss "our kill" and reference their duties as "hunters." A group of men discuss and try to justify a murder. People discuss the necessity of sacrificing human lives to appease the gods. A man says that it is acceptable to cut off fingers, noses, and ears as punishment. Two men discuss virgins being offered for sacrifice and one man offers himself. A man says that two cities will be smote for their lavish, oversexed and sinful ways and that all inhabitants will be destroyed. A man discusses his destiny being laid out for him by either "God" or "gods" and how this includes that he is the "Chosen One" who cannot be killed. A person states that a group of people was taken hostage and was now slaves that were being sold. A man is questioned about killing his brother.
► A group of men are shown hunting a boar using rudimentary spears and bows. A man attempts to shoot an ox with a blunt arrow, which bounces off the ox; the man brandishes a knife, runs and jumps onto the back of the ox, which bucks and throws him to the ground. A man is shown with presumably animal blood painted on his face in the shape of a hand. People are shown wearing animal pelts and a headdress made of an animal head is also worn.
► A man attempts to safely jump off a tall building, lands two stories down, and then falls to the ground with a thud. A large scaffolding is shown collapsing from a building and crashing down upon a man standing on the ground. A man breaks a spear over his knee with a violent snap. A man flips a full saucer from the hands of another person, purposely dumping the contents on the ground. A man purposefully flips over a bowl of food and runs from a table, shouting angrily at the people still seated around the table.
► Two men are shown, their faces visibly distressed, grabbing their stomachs, then vomiting, and sounds of retching as well as the stream of vomit is shown coming from both men's mouths. A man discusses the contents of a pile of stool which is shown on the ground, he lifts the stool to his face, where he smells deeply, hypothesizing on what the person had eaten; the man then licks and eats the stool, and states that it must be animal stool, not human. Streams of urine are shown running down the face of a man, into his nose and all over his face; another man tells him to keep his mouth shut and not allow the stream of urine into his mouth. The sound of flatulence is heard, and a man demonstrates, demands that another person listen to his ability to force flatulence from himself, and then a sound, presumably the sound of defecation, is heard and the man laughs. Bloody entrails are thrown on table and a man uses a stick to push the entrails around and inspects them, discussing their appearance, using highly descriptive language.
► A man refers to urinating on himself, and the urine going in his hair. A man spits on the feet of another man with disgust. A man protests when another man hurriedly runs past him, insisting that he relieve his bowels elsewhere, but the man is shown squatting beside a tree (defecation is not seen or heard).
PROFANITY 5 - 1 F-word, about 15 crude terms for intercourse, 15 scatological terms, 27 anatomical terms, 4 mild obscenities, two men are shown making crude hand gestures, a man comments "Hebrews are not very good at sports," 2 derogatory references to homosexuality, name-calling (stupid, cavemen, calling a man "little lady," jerk, fat, telling a man he sounds like a woman, fat face, lame, liar, numbskull, moron, idiot, calling a man a "little girl" and stupid), 1 exclamation ("shut up"), 1 religious exclamation. [profanity glossary]
SUBSTANCE USE - A person mentions "killer hemp," and a man talks about "smoking herb" to the point of intoxication. People are shown drinking from goblets which presumably contain alcohol, people are shown engaging in excessive drinking and eating, there's a discussion of people being intoxicated by drink, a man says it had been a long day and they had too much to drink, people are offered wine and sponge cake to relax, a man asks for wine saying, "I deserve a drink," a woman is instructed to drink a liquid so she "does not feel a thing" and is then shown acting in an extremely intoxicated way, and a man discusses smoking and drinking and is rebuked for smoking and drinking at such a young age.
DISCUSSION TOPICS - Slavery, fate, destiny, polytheism, monotheism, overthrowing of government, starvation, famine, being chosen by God, death, suicide, premarital sex, negative attitudes, human sacrifice, circumcision, evolution, hunting, magic, forbidden fruit, curses, lying, execution, homosexuality, orgies, incest, bestiality, circumcision, castration, murder, family, Biblical stories, virginity/virgins, violence towards women, objectification of women.
MESSAGE - Religious characters and beliefs can be the source of satire. Neolithic times were raunchy and violent but one can still discover one's own spiritual destiny.