Unlike the MPAA we do not assign one inscrutable rating based on age, but 3 objective ratings for SEX/NUDITY, VIOLENCE/GORE and PROFANITY on a scale of 0 to 10, from lowest to highest, depending on quantity and context.
Underworld: Evolution [2005] [R] - 7.9.5
Kate Beckinsale reprises her role as the vampire who’s leading the centuries
old fight between vampires and lycans. With the help of a vampire-lycan hybrid,
she hopes to unlock the secrets of their bloodlines. Also with Bill Nighy, Derek
Jacobi and Tony Curran. Directed by Len Wiseman. [1:26]
Firewall [2006]
[PG-13] - 2.7.5
Harrison Ford stars as a bank security expert responsible for creating an
advanced computer system that should prevent any sort of electronic theft.
However, when his family is kidnapped, he must break into his own system and
deliver $100 million to the kidnappers or his family will be killed. Also with
Paul Bettany, Jimmy Bennett, Virginia Madsen and Robert Patrick. Directed by
Richard Loncraine. [1:45]
Running
Scared [2006] [R] - 8.8.10
Paul Walker stars as a man who's been trying to muddle through life and take
care of his family while at the same time working for an organized crime boss,
disposing of items used in crimes. When he is entrusted with a gun that was used
to kill a corrupt cop and instead of disposing it he loses it, he must follow
its trail through the city before both the police and his boss trace it back to
him. Also with Cameron Bright, Vera Farmiga, Karel Roden and Johnny Messner.
Directed by Wayne Kramer. [1:59]
The Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada [2005] [R] - 7.7.7
Tommy Lee Jones directs and stars as Pete Perkins, a ranch hand in a small
Texas town, who befriends a Mexican man who is soon murdered. True to his dead
friend's wish, Pete takes the body to Mexico for a proper burial. And when the
local sheriff is not interested in pursuing the case, Pete decides to solve it
himself. Also with Julio Cedillo, Vanessa Bauche, Dwight Yoakam and Barry Tubb.
[2:01]
Glory Road
[2005] [PG] - 3.4.4
Josh Lucas stars as Hall of Fame basketball coach Don Haskins who made his
mark in 1965 by recruiting African-American young men for his college team and
then going on to win the NCAA Championships. Based on a true story. Also with
Derek Luke, Austin Nichols, Evan Jones and Emily Deschanel. Directed by James
Gartner. [1:58]
June 13
The Pink
Panther [2006] [PG] - 4.4.2
Steve Martin takes on the role of bumbling French police inspector Jacques
Clouseau, who's responsible mainly for driving his boss, Chief Dreyfus (Kevin
Kline), mad. When a priceless ring with a diamond known as the "Pink Panther" is
stolen and a master detective is not available to solve the crime, Inspector
Clouseau takes on the case. Also with Jean Reno, Emily Mortimer and Beyoncé
Knowles. Directed by Shawn Levy. [1:32]
16 Blocks [2006]
[PG-13] - 0.5.5
Bruce Willis stars as an aging police detective with a drinking problem,
who's leaving the station after a long shift only to be given the task of taking
a man accused of weapons possession from the station to the courthouse, only 16
blocks away. Thinking that it is a simple task, he quickly realizes there is
more to the prisoner than he originally thought, and he may never make it to the
courthouse. Also with David Zayas, David Sparrow, Bruce Willis, Dante 'Mos Def'
Smith and David Morse. Directed by Richard Donner. [1:45]
The
World's Fastest Indian [2005] [PG-13] - 4.4.5
Anthony Hopkins stars as Burt Monro, a 68-year-old New Zealand man who broke
the world speed record by riding his meticulously restored 1920 Indian Scout
motorcycle on the Bonneville Salt Flats of Utah. Based on a true story. Also
with Christopher Lawford, Bruce Greenwood, Paul Rodriguez and Diane Ladd.
Directed by Roger Donaldson. [2:07]
Dave Chappelle's Block Party [2006] [R] - 2.1.7
Dave Chappelle hosts a block party by traveling from Dayton, Ohio, to New
York, inviting people to join him along the way. The film was shot on location
in Bedford Stuyvesant, New York, and features Kanye West, Mos Def, Erykah Badu,
Dead Prez, Jill Scott, The Roots, and Talib Kweli. Directed by Michel Gondry.
[1:43]
Aquamarine
[2006] [PG] - 3.3.3
Two girls are finishing out their last summer together, since one of them is
moving to Australia. They wish for something to happen that would keep them
together, when they discover a mermaid in the pool of their neighborhood beach
club. The mermaid who grants them their wish -- as long as they can help her
find love in three days: If she cannot prove to her father that love exists, she
will have to marry someone she doesn't even like. With Emma Roberts, Joanna
'JoJo' Levesque, Sara Paxton, Jake McDorman and Arielle Kebbel. Directed by
Elizabeth Allen. [1:43]
End of the
Spear [2006] [PG-13] - 3.7.1
Missionaries travel to the Amazon basin in search of a little known tribe,
the Waodani, in hopes of converting them to Christianity. Misunderstandings
abound when they are unable to communicate and the missionaries are murdered by
tribe members. The missionaries' wives continue to try to convert the Waodani to
Christianity and forgive the killing of their husbands. With Chad Allen, Louie
Leonardo, Chad Allen, Jack Guzman, Christina Souza. Directed by Jim Hanon.
[1:52]
Kiss
Kiss, Bang Bang [2005] [R] - 8.7.10
Robert Downey Jr. stars as a petty thief who stumbles into an Hollywood movie
audition while running from the police, lands the part, and is assigned to
private detective training. The training involves working with a real private
detective, played by Val Kilmer, and trying to solve a real case of a suicide
that may be murder. Also with Michelle Monaghan, Joel Michaely and Corbin
Bernsen. Directed by Shane Black. [1:42]
June 20
Syriana [2005]
[R] - 1.8.6
Political thriller with George Clooney as a CIA operative working in the
Middle East, who is caught up in the struggle over the control of the oil
supply. In a parallel storyline, Matt Damon co-stars as a commodities broker
who's similarly caught up in the turmoil created by the oil trade. Also with
Jeffrey Wright, Chris Cooper and William Hurt. Directed by Stephen Gaghan.
[2:06]
The Hills
Have Eyes [2006] [R] - 6.10.6
A remake of the 1977 Wes Craven version about a family traveling across the
country on vacation and finding itself stranded in the New Mexico desert, close
to a government nuclear testing site. They soon realize that they are being
stalked by the bloodthirsty residents of an old mine, who have suffered genetic
mutations due to the effects of radiation. With Aaron Stanford, Ted Levine,
Kathleen Quinlan, Vinessa Shaw and Emilie De Ravin. Directed by Alexandre Aja.
[1:47]
Eight Below
[2006] [PG] - 2.4.1
Paul Walker stars as a guide in the frozen wilderness of Antarctica. When a
scientist (Bruce Greenwood) arrives searching for a meteorite that just may have
come from Mercury, he takes him, against his better judgment, to an extremely
isolated and unmapped region. Then a severe storm forces him to leave behind his
team of beloved sled dogs. Inspired by a true story. Also with Jason Biggs and
Moon Bloodgood. Directed by Frank Marshall. [1:52]
Night
Watch [2004] [R] - 6.9.6
Fantasy film set in contemporary Moscow that mixes horror and supernatural
elements and revolves around a truce that has been maintained since medieval
times between the forces of light and darkness. An ancient prophecy is about to
come true, and both forces are anxious to acquire the allegiance of a boy who's
destined to be super powerful. With Konstantin Khabensky, Vladimir Menshov,
Maria Poroshina, Galina Tyunina and Mariya Poroshina. Directed by Timour
Bekmambetov. In Russian, with English subtitles. [1:55]
June 27
Ultraviolet
[2006] [PG-13] - 3.7.4
Sci-fi action film set in the late 21st century: a subspecies of humans with
super human physical attributes has evolved due to a genetic mutation, but the
government wants to destroy them and treats them as outcasts. Enter Milla
Jovovich as Violet, aka V, a super-stylish and super lethal warrior out to get
revenge. Also with Cameron Bright, William Fichtner, Nick Chinlund and Sebastien
Andrieu. Directed by Kurt Wimmer. [1:25]
Failure
to Launch [2006] [PG-13] - 6.4.5
Matthew McConaughey stars as a 35-year-old man still living at home and
completely content in doing so. However, his parents (Kathy Bates and Terry
Bradshaw) are anxious to get him out on his own and hire an interventionist
(Sarah Jessica Parker) to help him along. But what sounds good in theory,
complicates the situation when they both begin to care for each other. Also with
Zooey Deschanel, Justin Bartha and Bradley Cooper. Directed by Tom Dey. [1:37]
Caché [2005] [R] -
6.6.5
Juliette Binoche and Daniel Auteuil star as a couple that's too busy to spend
much time together, until they begin to receive videotapes apparently filmed by
someone who is stalking them. Neither has any idea who the stalker is, although
as the footage becomes more personal, they begin to think that he has known them
for a while. In trying to solve the mystery, many other secrets are uncovered.
Also with Maurice Bénichou, Annie Girardot and Lester Makedonsky. Directed by
Michael Haneke. In French with English subtitles. [2:01]
Madea's Family Reunion [2006] [PG-13] - 4.5.4
Tyler Perry directs and reprises his role as Madea, a southern,
straight-talking aunt with solutions to all of her family's troubles. In this
installment, Madea tries to help Lisa and Vanessa, her two nieces, with
seemingly insurmountable relationship problems. She has also agreed, by court
order, to care for an unmanageable girl who has not been doing well in foster
care. And she has to organize a family reunion. Also with Blair Underwood, Lynn
Whitfield, Boris Kodjoe and Henry Simmons. [1:47]
Find Me
Guilty [2006] [R] - 4.5.10
Based on a true story, with Vin Diesel as Jackie Dinorsio, a man serving time
for narcotics possession, who's offered a deal by the DA if he'd give evidence
against his associates in the New Jersey Lucchesi crime family, who are being
charged with criminal conspiracy. He refuses and decides to defend himself in
the upcoming trial. Also with Peter Dinklage, Annabella Sciorra, Richard Portnow
and Linus Roache. Directed by Sidney Lumet. [2:05]
Annapolis [2006]
[PG-13] - 3.5.4
James Franco stars as a young man driven all of his life to be accepted into the
Annapolis Naval Academy. After finally achieving that dream, he quickly realizes
that life as a plebe can be hard and he may not be able to measure up. Also with
Jordana Brewster, Vicellous Reon Shannon, Donnie Wahlberg and Tyrese Gibson.
Directed by Justin Lin. [1:48]