Unlike the MPAA we do not assign
one
inscrutable rating based on age, but 3 objective ratings for SEX/NUDITY, VIOLENCE/GORE
and PROFANITY on a scale of 0 to 10, from lowest to highest,
depending on quantity and context.
A brother and sister (Daryl Sabara and Alexa Vega) discover
their boring parents (Antonio Banderas and Carla Gugino) are actually spies, but when
their parents are kidnapped (parentnapped?), the spy kids must come to the rescue. Also
with Alan Cumming, Tony Shalhoub, Teri Hatcher, Cheech Marin and Robert Patrick. [1:33]
SEX/NUDITY 0 - A man pulls a picture out of the inside of a woman's coat. A
wife flirts with her husband, whispering
in his ear.
VIOLENCE/GORE 4 - Lots of
tense action and chase scenes but no blood or gore.
There are several "thumb"
artificial creatures (their
heads and limbs are all made
out of huge thumbs): a girl spits
special gum on a
"thumb" and causes
it to convulse as if
electrocuted, and drop to
the floor; a "thumb" is electrocuted and killed. Two people
jump off a cliff but are saved thanks to their parachutes. Planes and helicopters fly over
a wedding and people
run and jump away; one
person lands on a table. A girl kicks a boy off
monkey bars; he falls and hits his face on the
floor but is fine. A boy throws a dumbbell at a girl and misses (breaks a flower pot
instead). A robot twists a girl's arm; then the girl punches
the presumably metallic robot and
her hand hurts. She then head-butts
it, but just falls to the
ground and her head now
hurts. A man throws
another man through a window, a man punches a window out and a man punches another in the
face. Several "thumbs"
attack a man, busting a wall down and capturing him. A boy pulls a man's
leg and knocks him to the ground and a girl flips a man. A man in a car almost runs over a
woman but no one is hurt. A car runs off the road over a cliff and into the sea, but then
turns into a submarine. Two kids are caught in a high speed
boat-like vehicle that's out
of control; a boy almost
falls into the sea, but a
girl pulls him back. Then
the vehicle speeds toward
the face of a cliff but at
the last moment turns into a
submarine and goes
underwater. A boat runs into
another boat, ripping it in half.
Two people are kidnapped and tied to chairs in two
separate scenes (first with rope and then with
colorful chains). A floor collapses twice and people
almost fall in. A man lands face-first on a glass floor, and two people fall through a
ceiling. Several men are
turned into
"mutants": they
have enlarged, squished
faces in gaudy colors; one
has extra fingers and hands
growing from his head. A man's face is distorted to make him look like a mutant. A boy hits himself in
the head with a metal lunchbox and a boy hits both a girl and a man in the head with a lunchbox.
Kids throw toys at adults. A man's hand is caught in a ceiling fan (no
injury or blood). A man grabs
a girl's leg, and a woman is hit and knocked down by a small rocket;
her hair catches
fire (we see the flames on her
head and later she's mostly
bald). A girl flies through a window. A plane malfunctions
and nearly crashes, scaring the two kids inside. Sharks swim in front of a boat, scaring
two kids. A few men fly through a billboard. A plane runs into a mountain and its wings
are clipped (no one is hurt). A girl drops a boy several feet
(he's not hurt). A robot tackles a girl, and a
robot punches a wall and
demolishes the plaster; a
boy tries to do the same and
he just causes himself pain
(no injury). A girl grabs a boy by the neck and throws him in the air. We hear several punches
and kicks and then see four
men on the ground. A man busts through a glass window.
People serve gross-looking pig intestines.
Two kids swim underwater,
through a cave filled with
sleeping sharks. A shark
wakes up and chases them,
with his mouth wide open. At
the last moment the kids get
away and close a door behind
them. A
boy says he urinated in the water,
and there's talk of a girl
wetting her bed.
the review continues below...
PROFANITY 2 - Two mild scatological references, and one
that starts out as a
scatological reference but turned into
"shitake mushrooms," several instances of name calling. [profanity glossary]
DISCUSSION TOPICS - Cloning, sibling spats, family, spies, loss of parents,
high-speed chases, mutants, kidnapping, evil men, madness.
MESSAGE - A smart and strong family can triumph over a wicked man and his
evil mutants any day.
A CAVEAT: We've gone through several editorial changes since we
started covering films in 1992 and some of our early standards were
not as stringent as they are now. We therefore need to revisit many
older reviews, especially those written prior to 1998 or so; please
keep this in mind if you're consulting a review from that period.
While we plan to revisit and correct older reviews our resources are
limited and it is a slow, time-consuming process.
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