Scary Movie 4 [2006] [PG-13] - 6.7.5

 
 

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ASSIGNED NUMBERS

Unlike the MPAA we do not assign one inscrutable rating based on age, but 3 objective ratings for SEX/NUDITY, VIOLENCE/GORE and PROFANITY on a scale of 0 to 10, from lowest to highest, depending on quantity and context.

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Sex & Nudity
Violence & Gore
Profanity
1 to 10

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As is the case with the first three "Scary Movie" installments, the 4th looks at notable movies and pokes fun at them in extreme fashion. Not all of the jokes are made at the expense of horror movies though; some include political responses to real life events, as well as movies like "Brokeback Mountain" and "Million Dollar Baby." With Anna Faris, Molly Shannon, Regina Hall, Craig Bierko and Leslie Nielsen. Directed by David Zucker. [1:23]

SEX/NUDITY 6 - Two men in a tent sing a love song to each other, they remove their shirts (their bare chests are revealed), one squirts himself with oil, the camera moves outside the tent and then the tent shakes suggesting that they are having sex.
 A man has an enormous erection after taking many Viagra pills (please see the Violence/Gore category for more details). A man's clothes are vaporized (we see his bare chest and buttocks), the clothes of many other people in the room are vaporized, and they all scream and run trying to cover themselves up (legs and shoulders are seen, one woman covers her breasts but part of a nipple is visible). Two men walk next to each other wearing chaps and nothing else, revealing their bare buttocks. We see a photograph of a woman with her top lifted up and exposing her bare breasts (her nipples are diffused).
 A man lies in bed with a duck: the man is bare-chested and spits out a feather implying that something sexual has happened. A woman walks into a room where a man is standing and a woman sits in front of him while he is making rhythmic exclamations, and it looks as if she is performing oral sex on him (she is churning butter). A man pretends to be having sex with a woman and a shoe (he climbs on them and thrusts his hips).
 Two men kiss passionately and we see their tongues slobbering. A man and a woman kiss in a few scenes. A woman hugs a man. An alien probe (it looks like a metal snake) thrusts toward a canister vacuum cleaner and giggles.
 Three scantily clad women (wearing bras that reveal cleavage) in a man's bed invite him to join them (he does not). A man sits in a bathtub (his bare chest is visible), and climbs out of the tub (we see him in his jockey shorts) when a woman enters the room. A man comes out of a building with his pants around his ankles (we see his bare legs). A woman showers (we see her bare arms and shoulders). Three scantily clad women (in bras and panties that reveal cleavage, bare abdomens and thighs) fight with pillows. A woman wears a low-cut dress that reveals cleavage.
 A song with the lyrics "I like big butts..." plays, as we see male and female bacteria (with accentuated breasts and buttocks) swimming on the screen, the camera pulls back and a man scratches his crotch. Storm clouds are shaped like buttocks.
 A woman takes off her dress thinking that she is in her house and alone (we see her in a corset and stockings that reveal cleavage and bare thighs), she walks to a cupboard, opens the hatch, sits on it and begins to go to the bathroom (please see the Violence/Gore category for more details), but she is actually in a room full of people.
 A man talks about many people being naked everywhere. Two men talk about sleeping with another man's ex-wife and then a woman joins in and makes a sexual remark about her.
 Two men lie in a tent together, and one reaches over the other (to get a bag of nuts). A person playing Michael Jackson holds onto several children and tries to convince a girl to join them.

VIOLENCE/GORE 7 - A man falls on a boy crushing and killing him (we hear a crunch and see the boy's twisted leg). Two men try to saw the chains off their ankles but when they are unable to do so, one man saws his foot off (he holds the foot in the air and we see a bit of bloody tissue at the ankle) and faints when he realizes he sawed the wrong foot off.
 A woman's lower jaw and chin are missing presumably from decay (we see her tongue hanging out of her mouth and drool pours from the opening). A boxer bites the ear off the referee during a boxing match, and then spits it toward the audience; the same boxer bites off the ears of many other people and spits them into a large pile on the floor (we see the pile of ear fragments and blood is visible on some of them).
 A man has an enormous erection after taking many Viagra pills, he pounds on the erection with a board, a cat clings to the erection, the man flings the cat out an open window, and he runs to a balcony and falls over (we see the man on the ground while his erection has apparently penetrated the pavement).
 A man holds a woman's hands, bends the wrists back until they break and we see her hands flopping about. A dismembered arm falls into the arms of a man. A woman pulls her eye out of the socket (we see the black hole remaining) and she says that she had a false eye implanted after an injury.
 A man lies on a bed with a knife in his chest, and a woman leans over him and presses on the knife inadvertently (the man moans). A man shoots himself in the buttocks and again in the crotch while trying to put a gun in his waistband. A man holding a razor blade is hugged and the blade is pressed into his chest (he moans and we see the blade protruding).
 During an alien attack clouds shaped like buttocks and tripod vehicles fire lasers at people running away (when the people are struck they are vaporized, leaving their clothes and jewelry to fall to the ground). A girl is zapped twice by alien lasers and we see her smoldering (she survives).
 A man is struck by a bus (he's swept off screen). A man hits a woman in the head with a chair. A green hand pokes out from under a woman's hair as she showers, the woman is startled, the hand begins to move and the woman hits it. A man and two children are pulled out of a car, the man shoots a gun in the air, and a man who was parasailing falls from the sky and crashes.
 Two women box exchanging many punches, one falls toward a stool, and many other people are shown falling and breaking their necks when they land (we hear a crunch with each person). A man and a woman punch each other in the face several times.
 A boy and a girl are lowered toward many spikes. A grey-tinged child tells a woman that he is dead. A grey-tinged person crawls down a flight of stairs like a crab, then falls down the stairs and rolls into a ball. A child (presumably dead, with grey tinged skin) sits in a tub of water, a man pushes the child under the water and tries to hold him there, and they struggle briefly.
 A man and a dog, both in flames, walk along a street. Two large creatures with long claws, tusks and pointed spines on their backs walk into a village trying to scare people. Several zombies stumble toward two men, they punch and kick them, and one throws an elderly woman down a manhole.
 A man hits a girl with a suitcase (she is thrown back), and then slams her head in a car door (accidentally). A girl's leg is closed in a car door. A man is hit on the head by a falling pipe and light fixture (he falls down but is not visibly injured). A woman is hit in the head by a baseball (she falls back onto the ground) and a woman is struck in the throat by a football and falls back onto the ground. A woman (presumably visually impaired) runs into a tree and falls down, and a man (he's not blind) runs into a wall and falls down. A man swings a woman around by the arms and throws her across a stage.
 Two women wake up with head masks, with spikes on the inside, clamped around their necks and a man has a rocket strapped around his back and pointing toward his anus. A man wakes up with his head underwater in a bathtub, and he panics when he realizes that his leg is chained to a wall.
 A woman enters a house, opens a door, and another woman who's lying on the floor touches the woman's leg; she screams, and tries to help the woman up, but knocks her head on a desk several times and then her hair is cut by a fan blade.
 A woman and a girl are wrapped by alien tentacles and pulled up into an alien ship where many others are being held. A man, a woman and a girl are pulled up into an alien vessel that resembles buttocks (they scream and struggle).
 A man strapped with explosives is attacked by many other people with sticks (we do not see him afterwards). A street breaks up beneath the feet of a crowd of people (they run and scream).
 A woman is knocked down by an airplane food cart. A woman is hit in the head with a metal pipe. A machine pinches and twists a man's nipples and he screams. A boy is hit by the exhaust of a grenade launcher and he is knocked to the ground (we see him with char on his face). A man is kicked in the crotch. Two women fight two other women trying to get their clothes (we see two of the women with their hair tussled).
 A woman throws a bottle at a man (the bottle breaks on the wall behind him). A teenage boy kicks down a locked door. A woman climbs into a dark attic carrying a lit lighter, and a grey-tinged child screams when the flame burns his hand and the woman screams.
 A plane in flames falls from the sky and crashes in the distance. A city is in rubble and flames burn all around. Large shipping crates crash together mid-air (hanging by chains as they are lifted off ships), and they spill their freight -- resulting in lots of monkeys running loose and creating havoc. A woman throws a car part at a man driving a car, it hits him in the head, and he is knocked unconscious and drives the car into a light pole.
 A woman talks about having to lance a woman's boil and of other medical conditions and treatments, which she demonstrates with her hands and tools (a stapler, tongs, medical instruments); she then walks toward a woman carrying a hot water bottle and a tube, in order to perform an enema.
 A woman gives another woman a sponge bath (she is clothed in a house dress) using a sponge that she accidentally dips in a bed pan filled with urine; she squeezes the sponge on the woman's head and face and then sprays her with a hose when she realizes what she has done (the woman falls back off her chair from the force of the water).
 A woman takes off her dress thinking that she is in her house and alone, she walks to a cupboard, opens the hatch, sits on it and begins to go to the bathroom but she is actually in a room full of people (we hear a lot of flatulence and splattering).
 People vomit, and a man commits hara-kiri, when they see a nude man. Goo dangles from a man's nose. A man spits milk on several children who then spit milk on him, when he says that their parents could be dead. A man puts a bowl of mashed potatoes on his head and a woman pours hot coffee over her head.
 A woman delivers a baby wearing an evil looking clown mask. Two men talk about zombies. A voice tells two men that they are breathing in a nerve gas that will kill them, and they panic. A man yells at another man. A husband and wife argue.

PROFANITY 5 - 1 F-word, 1 not fully enunciated F-word derivative, 8 sexual references, 16 scatological terms, 14 anatomical terms, 20 mild obscenities, name-calling (stupid), a man tells several insulting and racist jokes, 19 religious exclamations. [profanity glossary]

SUBSTANCE USE - A man takes numerous pills (they turn out to be Viagra) and washes them down with vodka. People drink alcohol in a bar and two men drink wine.

DISCUSSION TOPICS - Horror films, real life horror, sequels, satire, homosexuality, divorce, responsibility, alien invasion, forgiveness, death of a spouse, letting people down, disappointment, abortion, incompetence, bestiality, Michael Jackson.

MESSAGE - It's time to end this series of film spoofs.

Special Keywords: S6 - V7 - P5 - MPAAPG-13

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