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Machete Kills [2013] [R] - 5.9.10



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Unlike the MPAA we do not assign one inscrutable rating based on age, but 3 objective ratings for SEX/NUDITY, VIOLENCE/GORE and PROFANITY on a scale of 0 to 10, from lowest to highest, depending on quantity and context.

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Sex & Nudity
Violence & Gore
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In this sequel Machete (Danny Trejo) is a former Mexican agent that returns to work for the US when he is recruited by President Rathcock (Carlos Estevez) as America's last best hope against bad guys. Machete must eliminate an insane revolutionary (Damien Bichir) and a billionaire arms dealer (Mel Gibson) that are bent on war and destruction. Also with Michelle Rodriguez, Sofia Vergara, Antonio Banderas, Lady Gaga, Amber Heard. Several scenes feature Spanish language with English subtitles. Directed by Robert Rodriguez. [1:47]

SEX/NUDITY 5 - A woman in her dressing room, wearing a tight-fitting bodice, straddles a man on her couch and begins to pull down her bodice as the scene changes and we hear her groan and gasp while we see what looks like a man and a woman writhing in a sex position; then the scene ends. Three women wearing long-sleeved pajamas are shown lying side-by-side with the US President, also wearing pajamas, under covers in a bed. A woman kisses a man on the forehead.
 Women in a pageant wear low-cut gowns that reveal cleavage; one entrant wears a tight-fitting bodice that makes the tops of her breasts bulge over the opening. A woman paints her toenails while wearing a negligee that reveals bare shoulders and legs. A woman removes her robe to reveal a skimpy bikini as she walks off screen and we hear that a billionaire boyfriend bought the Miss Texas title for her. A woman wears a costume like a one-piece swimsuit and adjusts her breasts by pushing on them; the suit reveals her bare shoulders, arms, thighs and legs. A shirtless man in a pool reveals his bare chest, shoulders and arms covered with tattoos. A woman wears a tight-fitting leather vest, short-shorts and boots (we see bare shoulders, arms, cleavage and legs to the thigh). We see a still shot of a bare female leg and thigh on a poster in close-up.
 A brothel madam vaguely states that she was molested nightly by her father, until she chewed off his genitals (please see the Violence/Gore category for more details). In a filthy, decrepit area, a brothel offers a dozen scantily-clad women wearing decorated bras, corsets, thong panties and hose and garters (cleavage, bare abdomens, buttocks and upper thighs are seen); the madam is dressed in a corset, panties and net hosiery as she tells the other women to keep their legs spread, their panties off and their [anatomical term deleted] well oiled. An effeminate man asks a bartender if there is a Popsicle he can stick up his [anatomical term deleted]. A woman calls another woman a "bimbo that spreads like butter." A male soldier tells a female agent to lose the strapped-on [anatomical term deleted] she rode in on.

VIOLENCE/GORE 9 - Soldiers unload crates of rifles for sale to enemies as two Mexican agents approach and attempt to arrest the group when two other groups appear and begin shooting automatic weapons: a soldier is shot in the knee and he shouts and limps while many other men fall dead (a little blood is shown); a man dressed as a wrestler shoots a woman in the forehead in close-up and she falls dead (we see a bleeding hole the size of a 50-cent piece) and another man with a machete cuts off the heads of six other men as he swings on a cable from a helicopter (we see spurting blood and the heads hitting the ground in a long shot); a swordsman sticks his blade into a transformer and touches another man with his other hand, electrocuting the victim, and then slices another man in half from head, down, creating a fountain of blood.
 A man with a three-bladed machete slices up another man's abdomen and groin (blood sprays but no entrails are shown); the man pushes himself back together to attack as the swordsman cuts his head off with a cable from a helicopter and we see blood spray and the head fall through the air in a long shot (blood spatter clouds the camera lens); we later see that the second man is a clone and he reappears in many scenes, is dismembered by a machete and appears again. A man hooks a soldier, from among a group shooting at him, to a cable that reels the soldier into helicopter blades, creating a wide blood spray as he hits the rotors. A motorboat crashes onto a dock and tears up three shouting soldiers with its rotor and they are thrown toward the camera (we see the bloody rotor as it slows down in a close-up). A man confronted by a Sheriff and a deputy cuts the Sheriff's arm off (blood flows) and shoots the deputy between the eyes, presumably dead; we see his bloody forehead. A soldier cuts off the head of a man and we see a lot of blood. Several soldiers shoot a man as another soldier approaches, carrying a man's severed head. A man at a dinner table rises to kill a waiter that he calls clumsy, by stabbing a corkscrew into the man's throat and we see blood.
 A man fights clones of thug and dispatches them all, cutting off a head with blood gushing, slicing off a leg with blood and using martial arts techniques; soldiers join the fight against the man and a molecular blaster is fired that "turns things inside out"; the soldiers become piles of black bones and dust and an SUV becomes a pile of debris and soot; the man cuts off the heads of several soldiers using a cable on a reel mechanism and we see blood spray in a long shot. A man with a machete fights a thug and cuts off his head (lots of blood splatters).
 A soldier interrupts a radio interview by shooting the person being interviewed (we see a spot of blood on the victim's chest), and then announces a bounty on two men; in a local café, men and women pick up knives when they hear the broadcast and a man with a handgun enters and points the weapon at the two men; a brawl ensues and we see flying knives and cleavers, one man catches a cleaver and throws it back at another man, slicing into his forehead with blood gushing while another man beats a gunman in the face with his fists until the man's face is a chopped-up bloody mess and the victim raises a handgun, but is shot in the chest by a third man (we see a bloody hole) and he dies. A man in a bar shoots the bartender, another man and a woman sitting at a table (we see bullet holes and blood). A man shoots an elderly man at a gas station and he falls dead off-screen (no blood); the gunman then shoots another man and the man's wife (we see the bloody bullet holes), and then shoves the dead woman out of her van and steals it.
 A woman whips a shirtless man tied face down to a table and he gasps and groans with each lash while the woman says that she is called "man-eater" because she chewed her father's genitals off and pieces got stuck in her braces (please see the Sex/Nudity category for more details); the man collapses and it is unclear if he is dead. In a flashback, we see a man shoot a prisoner tied in a chair and blood shows at the heart; he is then tied into the chair himself and made to watch as his wife and young daughter are tortured off-screen with screams and shouts of pain (we hear that they died).
 A one-eyed woman wearing an eye patch and another woman fight in several scenes, calling each other names and using martial arts and handguns; the one-eyed woman's good eye is shot out and we see a lot of blood; the fight continues with one woman cutting the skirt of her gown off as the other woman slides on her knees and punches her in the crotch, causing her to scream and shout in pain to end the scene. In a flashback, we see a man in close-up as he seems to be nailing a priest to a wall (we see blood flow); in real time, the man wears a priest's collar and says that he fights the drug cartels until another man chokes him, but stops and lets him live. A blind woman catches a pageant crown thrown at her and tosses it back to stab the woman who threw it in the heart (we see blood around the wound) and she pulls the crown out and collapses. A man lowers a machine that freezes a woman in a bronze coating, then activates a space shuttle and loads dozens of people.
 At a chop shop, two men fire a weapon into the O2 tank of a man in a wheelchair and he is propelled into the parking lot as other men on roofs shoot the man many times, raising dust and killing him in a long shot; the first two men steal an armored car and are chased by prostitutes, soldiers and a woman driving a VW bus while they all fire at the armored car, unsuccessfully; a van crashes (no one inside is hurt), a VW bus flips over the van (no one is hurt), and a woman shoots a man, already bleeding, in the head (we see her shoot off-screen and hear the man groan, presumably dead).
 A man takes another man to a clinic for treatment of a raw wound on his neck when scantily clad prostitutes enter, firing automatic weapons; the first man puts transfusion blood bags into a microwave and blood explodes all over the women, causing them to drop weapons and leave in disgust. A woman pulls off a rubber mask to reveal a man, shoots a semi-truck driver and steals his vehicle; she picks up a hitchhiker and forces him to dig his own grave until the grave runs into a tunnel for runaway Mexicans and the truck driver chases the other man down the hole. Emerging on the US side of a tunnel, a man confronts a large group of armed border vigilantes, who shoot him off-screen (he is presumably killed). A woman arrives at night at an abandoned drive-in theater with thugs whom she tells to kill a federal agent; her men and the agent's people have a shootout and many men fall dead (no blood is shown).
 At a banquet, several people pose as staff and a fight breaks out between them and armed guards; men, some bloody, fall dead and someone shoots a heart in a glass case that is wired to a time bomb.
 A dozen prostitutes with automatic rifles in a brothel attack a man after he walks into the house while the madam shoots arrowheads at him from the points of her bra and he runs upstairs, grabs a woman and jumps through a window to the ground safely (we see and hear shattered glass); the man and the woman are captured and placed into a helicopter where the woman is shot in the side (no blood) and pushed out (we see her fall through their air, but not hit the ground). A man shoots four of his own soldiers, a scientist in his employ and his bodyguard. A woman drives a van, chasing a man and shooting at him from the points of her metallic bra (she misses him each time). A man shocks a woman with defibrillator paddles, but she is not harmed; she chases the man on foot and shoots from her metallic bra tips and a handgun strapped to her groin as she thrusts it, but misses.
 In several scenes, a man with a machete threatens other men, sometimes holding it under their throats, but he does not cut anyone. A man with a noose around his neck stands on a stool in a sheriff's office and another man kicks away the stool, the man's feet dangle and the sheriff shoots the noose away.
 A man jumps onto a missile aimed at Washington, DC and as it takes off, cuts its wires to disable it; it falls into a body of shallow water, disarmed.
 The launch switch of a missile aimed at Washington, DC is wired into the heart of a vigilante and we see several scenes that show the medallion on the switch in his chest/shoulder with blood surrounding the medallion; one brief scene shows the man on an operating table with a large bloody hole in his chest awaiting the implantation of the switch and we see him pull the pin in one scene, setting the bomb for 24 hours. We hear a scream off-screen and see an animated splash of blood spray on the screen. A person called "Chameleon" pulls off three rubber masks and grimaces to become other people of different races and genders. We see a pumping heart in a glass case and the heart is attached to a missile switch with just a few hours left before detonation.
 A man says that he will destroy Washington, DC if the Mexican cartels are not destroyed. A woman tells a man that a vigilante will gut him like a game hen.
 A US President holds an assault rifle in a campaign ad and after the end credits, fires it and a molecular blaster, pointing off-screen. A man says that he built a space station and a space shuttle for his followers, because the world is ending and he wants to leave and come back to set up an empire; we see that he has many nuclear firearms and electric swords. A beauty pageant contestant has a hidden wall of firearms and swords in her dressing room.
 Film footage on a screen shows three men being beamed away (vanishing) while a man watching says that the went to a man's space station.
 Grainy, 1970s-type sequences at the beginning and end of the film feature spaceships exploding in a flash of light and two men fighting with machetes and light sabers; women wearing skimpy bikini outfits fire automatic rifles at the screen with loud noise and smoke and a graphic banner reads that the film is rated X and named "Machete Kills Again -- In Space." A man is shown climbing into a rocket and the rocket takes off, followed by a sequence advertising "Machete Kills Again -- In Space."

PROFANITY 10 - About 54 F-words and its derivatives, 1 obscene hand gesture, 16 scatological terms, 20 anatomical terms, 21 mild obscenities, name-calling (Taco, piñata, crazy, loco, red-headed runt, Mongoloid, Special Ed Science Project, sick, twisted, low-life, numb-nuts, douche bag, fool, bimbo, turkey), stereotypical references to men, women, federal agents, politicians, spies, beauty pageant entrants, Mexicans, Canadians, gays, arms dealers, billionaires, 7 religious profanities (GD), 6 religious exclamations (e.g. God bless Texas, Jesus, God has cursed me, For Christ's sake, Hallelujah). [profanity glossary]

SUBSTANCE USE - We hear that a man will blow up Washington, DC if no one will blow up Mexico and its drug cartels (please see the Violence/Gore category for more details). A man pours two shot glasses of liquor and he and another man drink them, a man pours three shots of alcohol in succession and drinks each one down while laughing maniacally, a bar scene features a tall back bar with liquor bottles and empty beverage glasses, a bottle of beer is shown on a bar and cocktails on a table in the background (no one is shown drinking), and a dinner table contains glasses of wine. A man lights and smokes a cigarette, and another man smokes a cigarette.

DISCUSSION TOPICS - War, firearms, doomsday plots, space exploration, wealth and power, immigration laws, drug cartels, patriotism, prostitution, corruption, beauty pageants.

MESSAGE - The world is full of politics and mayhem.

Special Keywords: S5 - V9 - P10 - MPAAR

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