Couples Retreat [2009] [PG-13] - 6.4.4

 
 

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ASSIGNED NUMBERS

Unlike the MPAA we do not assign one inscrutable rating based on age, but 3 objective ratings for SEX/NUDITY, VIOLENCE/GORE and PROFANITY on a scale of 0 to 10, from lowest to highest, depending on quantity and context.

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Sex & Nudity
Violence & Gore
Profanity
1 to 10

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Four couples take a long-awaited vacation on a tropical island, but soon realize that the highly acclaimed resort is not what they expected: One couple is there to work on improving their marriage, but the others are there simply to have fun, and don't know that participation in the resort's therapy sessions is not optional. With Malin Akerman, Vince Vaughn, Jason Bateman, Jon Favreau, Kristin Davis, Kristen Bell, Faizon Love, Jean Reno and Carlos Ponce. Directed by Peter Billingsley. [1:47]

SEX/NUDITY 6 - A bare-chested man, in an overhead shot, lies on a bed and the camera cuts to a woman wearing a sleeveless top (revealing slight cleavage) who stands above him holding a lighted candle and saying "Baby..." and "Daddy" while dripping melted candle wax on the man's abdomen; she then says, "bang, bang" and he replies "pow, pow" and it is implied that they have sex.
 A man is involved in two scenes that suggest masturbation: In one, his wife locks herself in the bedroom, he props a picture of a woman wearing a bikini beside the couch where he lies, raises his shirt, squirts lotion on his lower abdomen and is interrupted by a room service waiter; another scene shows the man lying on a massage table, he removes his clothing from underneath a sheet as the female massage therapist rubs his neck, chest and sides, an erection rises under the sheet, the woman apologizes, and the man asks her to do "something" -- she refuses and he asks for some massage oil and tells her to leave the room.
 A husband and his wife grab each other, kiss passionately, push against a door breaking it in, they stumble into a darkened bedroom, breaking shelves and knick knacks as they continue to kiss, and they throw themselves on the bed; the scene ends and sex is implied.
 Men and women kiss briefly throughout the film.
 In a massage scene, a woman tells the male massage therapist that she enjoys the neck rub he gives her and he tells her that he likes pleasuring people and that he has a husband.
 A yoga instructor places a woman on her back on a mat with her legs up over her head, he kneels between her thighs and manually pushes her legs down while talking about penetrating with a stretch and he thrusts toward her and touches her genital area with his own; the woman's husband tells him to stop pulsating. A yoga instructor walks up behind a man as he sits, reaches around and massages the man's pectoral muscles and nipples. A yoga instructor lays a man on his back, straddles the man's body at the chest facing the other way, and squats, putting his buttocks in the man's face. A yoga instructor teaches couples exercises that look like intercourse (they are fully clothed): the instructor lies on top of the back of one man, face down, who is already lying on top of his wife and thrusting during one of these exercises. A male yoga instructor leads a class using sexually suggestive movements.
 During a group therapy session a therapist tells the group on a beach to disrobe as he drops his bathrobe to reveal only tight swim briefs, and another man is shown bare-chested to the waist and wearing a long sarong; yet another man, with an overhanging belly, says he has no drawers on, the instructor tells him to "let it all hang" and his girlfriend drops his trousers and we see his buttocks, stomach, and thighs while women in the group gasp and squeal in reaction to the size of the man's genitals (one man says, "Now the party starts").
 A man wearing a sarong that reveals his bare chest and upper pelvic area approaches three women at nighttime on a beach, gives them rum, the women giggle and the man laughs, rubs his hands together, and speaks about fun, suggesting that he expects a sexual encounter. A man stares at several women in skimpy bikinis and tries to follow them.
 Young couples are shown dancing suggestively and thrusting to music. A married couple dances and they grab their crotches at their wedding reception.
 A husband asks his wife for a date and she tells him his pickup line is bad. Two men discuss how frequently they have sex with their wives, they agree that twice a week is a lot and that it is different now that they have kids. Two men discuss sex and one man adds that he is attracted to men as well as women, especially men's hot, sweaty, shining backs. Several marriage-counseling scenes among four couples include therapists asking couples how often they have sex. Two men argue about whether they need to mention everyone they have had sex with in therapy. A woman tells her ex-husband that she left him for sexual adventures like one-night stands and nameless sex. A woman says that she and her husband have not had sex during the retreat. A man states several times that he is too old and tired for sex. A yoga instructor repeatedly says, "Boom" softly, every time his crotch touches someone else, which is often. A resort manager tells four couples that one part of the resort is for couples to work on their relationships and the other part is for sex. A man tells other men that the younger couples are having sex and that he has more serious things to do, like getting back together with his wife. A husband and his wife tell friends that they may divorce because the wife cannot become pregnant, but they want to go to a couples' retreat for help. A husband and his wife tell their teen daughter that the clothing she is wearing for a date is unacceptable; her skirt is described as "only a maxi-pad," and they tell her that she is sending blatant sexual signals. A father tells his teen daughter that he does not want to see bikini pictures of her on her FaceBook page.
 Twice in a department store, a 3-year-old boy uses a demonstration toilet on the sales floor: The first time, we see a stream of urine entering the toilet and the second time he is shown sitting on it with his pants at his ankles.
 Many scenes feature women in low-cut tops that reveal cleavage and skirts or shorts that reveal thighs up to the bottom of the buttocks. A teen girl wears a micro-mini skirt with a tight knit tube top that reveals bare abdomen and slight cleavage. Several women are shown wearing underwear that reveals the bottom of their buttocks, full thighs and legs and some cleavage. A man appears in several scenes in very tight swimming briefs revealing his entire, shaved body (his genitals create an oversized bulge. A man is presumably fully nude with a palm frond blocking any view of his genitals. Three men are shown shirtless, in boxer shorts that reveal bare chests, calves, knees and partial thighs. Many scenes feature women in skimpy bikinis and bare-chested men wearing tight swim briefs. Male dancers wear loincloths. In a slide presentation, an exotic island locale features pictures of women in bikinis, bare-chested men swimming in the sea, and men and women kissing. Several scenes show men or women on massage tables in close-up, showing bare necks and shoulders.

VIOLENCE/GORE 4 - Two men swim with very small sharks, and one man panics and spills a bucket of cut up chum into the sea, spreading blood, and as the sharks come to investigate the men swim toward a boat; the second man becomes angry, says it's time to get guns and shoot fish, and tells everyone in the boat to save themselves (he later claims that shark teeth penetrated his skin and we see a short pink scrape on his knee).
 A man sees another man dancing with his wife, he charges over to them and punches the man in the face, making him fall backward (we do not see any physical damage); the husband and his wife argue briefly.
 A man tosses pebbles against a window of a friend's house setting off burglar alarms; the man inside the house gets a handgun, loads it, goes downstairs and the first man opens a door, his friend lowers the gun and they argue briefly.
 Throughout the film, four couples argue with marriage counselors several times: One argument escalates briefly as a man points and tells the therapist he might shoot him in the head to get an answer; in another session, a man tells the therapist that the marriage is fine because there is no domestic violence and the wife agrees; three couples argue several times with a fourth couple and later we see wives slamming bedroom doors and locking their husbands out.
 Four men and three women in canoes find one man's girlfriend, they argue as to whether she is dead, and during a storm two women fall overboard.
 Two men play dueling Guitar Hero, with some sparks flying from one of the guitars. Male dancers twirl flaming torches at an outdoor dinner as they dance with stomping movements. A flaming dessert fills the screen in a brief close-up.
 Servers and attendants are shown to have tattoos on their necks, shoulders and biceps that depict wild animals. The entire front of a T-shirt of one customer shows the large face of a roaring open-mouthed tiger with sharp teeth in close-up.
 Twice in a department store, a 3-year-old boy uses a demonstration toilet on the sales floor: The first time, we see a stream of urine entering the toilet and the second time he is shown sitting on it with his pants at his ankles.

PROFANITY 4 - 17 scatological references, 41 anatomical references, 7 sexual references, 11 mild obscenities, name-calling (crazy, nuts, bulldozer, Mr. Belvedere, glass house, Hump Island, boring, black and white suburban trash, senior citizen, cougar, puma, black panther), 16 instances of stereotypical references about African Americans, Caucasians, the French, gays, marriage, 20-something women, middle-aged women and men, therapy retreats, mental health professionals and fitness instructors, 13 religious exclamations. [profanity glossary]

SUBSTANCE USE - Alcoholic beverages in bottles and glasses are seen in many scenes on beaches, in restaurants, and in bars: in a party scene at a swimming pool bar we see a few people drinking, two people drink from beer bottles, three women at a children's birthday party pour white wine and drink several times, men are shown with beer bottles, people dance at an outdoor bar at night while drinking cocktails and beer, a man drinks shots of a neon-blue liquor, a woman complains that she is bored and wants to "do shots" (she leans back over a serving bar with her mouth open and two men pour liquor down her throat), a man approaches three women and gives them rum (which they drink, they giggle, one coughs and they are shown getting up and staggering slightly), ands a husband and his wife drink beer. A man tells his massage therapist to leave him by saying, "Go have a smoke."

DISCUSSION TOPICS - Relationships, commitment, infertility, work, mental health therapy, negotiation, compromise, conflict, honesty, infidelity, forgiveness, and reconciliation.

MESSAGE - Couples retreats don't work if the couples can't get along.

Special Keywords: S6 - V4 - P4 - MPAAPG-13

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