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The Canyons [2013] [R] - 9.5.10



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Unlike the MPAA we do not assign one inscrutable rating based on age, but 3 objective ratings for SEX/NUDITY, VIOLENCE/GORE and PROFANITY on a scale of 0 to 10, from lowest to highest, depending on quantity and context.

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Sex & Nudity
Violence & Gore
1 to 10


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A psychopathic LA trust-fund control freak (James Deen) spins out of control after he learns of his girlfriend's (Linsday Lohan) affair with the lead of a movie he is financing. Also with Nolan Gerard Funk, Amanda Brooks, Gus Van Sant and Tenille Houston. Directed by Paul Schrader. [1:39]

SEX/NUDITY 9 - We see a woman wearing a corset top and brief style underwear as another woman (fully nude with bare breasts and genital area visible) and two men, fully nude (also with genitals visible) walk into a room: a man climbs on top of the woman and we see both couples kissing passionately, one man instructs the two women to kiss and we watch them kiss until one of the women stops and asks the two men to kiss and the two men kiss passionately and then we see one woman instruct one man to perform oral sex on the other man; we see the two women topless (bare breasts are visible) and watching while kissing the men's shoulders and rubbing their arms, as the man performs oral sex on the other man and we see the man enjoying himself and hear him moaning.
 A woman takes off her bra, exposing her bare breasts, as a man films (using a cell phone) the woman and another man kissing passionately; the man takes off his shirt (we see his bare chest) and pants (we see his genitals) as the woman lays down on a couch (her bare breasts are visible) and the second man looks at the nude man, puts down his phone and appears to perform oral sex on the woman (we see her bare breasts, and his head is covering her crotch).
 A woman takes off her robe (we see her bare breasts and she is wearing lace brief-style underwear) and a man takes off his shirt (his bare chest is visible) and follows her into a bedroom; the man is seen on top of the woman and thrusting as they have sex, then he stops and rolls off and we see her bare breasts as they talk; the woman wraps a robe around herself and tells the man to leave and he offers her money, which she declines.
 A man takes off his shirt (his bare chest and back are visible) and walks into a room where a woman is crying and they kiss passionately; the young man lays the woman down on the bed and it is implied that the two have sex.
 We hear a man open his belt and zipper, and then crudely tells another man to perform oral sex on him; the man continues to tell the man to perform oral sex crudely, telling him to make him sexually excited (we see no nudity, but it is implied that the man performs oral sex on the other man).
 We see a woman in the shower (her bare back and breasts are visible and when she turns we see a portion of her bare buttocks). A woman strips down to her bra and brief-style underwear and then wraps a robe around herself. We see a man wearing brief-style underwear (his bare back and chest are visible). A man shows a woman a picture of a man wearing brief-style underwear and his bare chest is visible. We see a man posing for photographs while wearing bikini-brief style underwear (his bare chest is visible). A woman wears a one-piece bathing suit with a sheer insert in the front, exposing her cleavage and a portion of her bare chest and torso. A woman wears a sweater unbuttoned partially and we see her cleavage. We see a woman and a man in a hot tub and the man's bare chest is visible while the woman is wearing a bikini.
 A woman takes off her robe, exposing her bra and brief-style underwear before kissing a man passionately. A man and woman kiss, the man pushing himself against the woman's backside as they kiss. A man kisses a woman on the cheek. A woman kisses a man. We see two men hug. A man tries to rub another man's leg with his foot; the man appears uncomfortable and interrupts, as the man implies that he might be willing to pay the man for sex.
 A woman tells another woman that she had been forced by a man (who the other woman was currently dating) to have sex with other people, and that the man had been cheating on her; she tells her that she had been raped by multiple men, and that the woman's boyfriend had filmed it and threatened to play it on the internet; the woman is upset by the other woman's accusations and warns her that she will soon have a similar experience if the woman does not dump her boyfriend. A man tells another man to threaten a second man, saying he would give the man a part in a movie if the man has sex with him; the man is horrified, saying that he is not gay, and then makes a snide remark that the straight man might have sex with the gay man anyway. A man tells his girlfriend that he had been cheating on her for the past month with a woman he had previously been in a relationship with for a year. A man tells a doctor that he had been sexually involved with another man the previous night; that his girlfriend had instructed a man to perform oral sex on the man and that the woman tried to convince the man to have sex with him and then adds that he had not allowed the man to have sex with him. A man tells another man that he uses a phone app to find "hookups" including with couples and other women; the man asks if he gets jealous when he watches his girlfriend "hook up" with people and he explains that he does not get jealous when he watches his girlfriend have sex with other women. A man makes a crude remark to a woman, that she had told a woman a story of men "running a train" on her (meaning forced group sex). A man leaves another man a rambling voicemail message, accusing him of having sex with a man and then that he is having sex with the man's girlfriend. A man tells a woman that another man is on his way to their house to have sex with the woman. A man asks a woman if she had sex with another man, then makes a crude remark asking about the size of the man's genitals. A woman makes a snide remark about another woman, saying that the woman needed to do something besides have sex. A man asks a woman if she has sex with random couples and other men. A man tells another man that his boyfriend is convinced the man is always trying to sleep with other men. A man tells a woman that the two of them having sex for four weeks is not going to make it. A man crudely asks his girlfriend if she would have sex with another man. A man asks another man to come on a weekend trip with him implying that he would keep the man on in a movie role if he would come on vacation. A man tells another man that he films himself and other people having sex. A woman makes a snide remark implying that a man is having sex with someone while he is supposed to be taking yoga classes.

VIOLENCE/GORE 5 - We see a man holding a knife while wearing gloves and moments later we see him covered in blood (it is implied that he murdered a woman); a second man discovers the dead woman covered in a blood and we see stab wounds and blood splashes on her shirt, chest, face and legs (the woman is obviously dead).
 A man grabs another man by the neck and throws him against a car, then angrily shouts at him, grabs his phone and throws it on the ground, smashing it and shoves the other man away. A man grabs a woman's hand and shoves her to the ground while screaming in her face and threatening to beat her up while the woman cries.
 A man threatens a woman, telling her that if she ever sees a man again, he will kill the man. A woman shouts angrily at a man to leave. A woman shouts at a man. A woman asks another woman about details about a woman's murder and we hear the woman go into detail about how a knife had been found in another person's car. A woman remarks that a movie is a "slasher film." A man makes a snide remark that he is too busy to watch "a bunch of kids get tortured and killed."

PROFANITY 10 - About 68 F-words and its derivatives, 21 sexual references, 8 scatological terms, 10 anatomical terms, 7 mild obscenities, name-calling (clueless, moron, loser actor, liar, sick [F-word deleted], psycho, moron, creep, sick, sick little boy), 3 religious profanities (GD), 5 religious exclamations (e.g. Oh my God, Jesus, swear to God). [profanity glossary]

SUBSTANCE USE - A man snorts cocaine and rubs some cocaine on his gums, a woman makes a snide remark that she was "pretty wasted" during a few years of her life, a woman tells another woman that a man had drugged her and forced her to have group sex, a woman asks a man if he had drugged another woman and he says no, a man confronts a woman and tells her that he knows that she had told people that she was given drugs by him, and a man accuses a woman of being "a drug addict." We see men and women drinking wine at a restaurant, a woman is seen drinking a cocktail, a man pours shots of liquor for another man and himself then drinks a shot of liquor, and men and women drink wine. A woman smokes a cigarette.

DISCUSSION TOPICS - Date rape, murder, movie making, psychopaths.

MESSAGE - People can be very disturbing.

Special Keywords: S9 - V5 - P10 - MPAAR

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A CAVEAT: We've gone through several editorial changes since we started covering films in 1992 and some of our early standards were not as stringent as they are now. We therefore need to revisit many older reviews, especially those written prior to 1998 or so; please keep this in mind if you're consulting a review from that period. While we plan to revisit and correct older reviews our resources are limited and it is a slow, time-consuming process.

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