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Blades of Glory [2007] [PG-13] - 6.6.4



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Unlike the MPAA we do not assign one inscrutable rating based on age, but 3 objective ratings for SEX/NUDITY, VIOLENCE/GORE and PROFANITY on a scale of 0 to 10, from lowest to highest, depending on quantity and context.

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Sex & Nudity
Violence & Gore
1 to 10


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Two Olympic figure skaters (Will Ferrell and Jon Heder) are banned from skating for life after a squabble over the gold medal. But a loophole in the by-laws leads them to decide that they can continue competing, as a pair. As the first male-male pair of figure skaters they are not warmly welcomed by the other competitors, plus they must tame their fierce rivalry if they are to work together. Also with Will Arnett, Amy Poehler and Jenna Fischer. Directed by Will Speck & Josh Gordon. [1:33]

SEX/NUDITY 6 - A brother and sister kiss passionately. A man kisses a woman's neck and caresses her buttock (they are both clothed). A man licks a woman's face.
 Men and women kiss passionately while outside, a man stands up from behind a shrub zipping up his pants, and another disheveled couple gets up and runs away when a sex addiction counselor tells them to leave.
 A woman wearing a corset and stockings opens her door and invites a man in, he sits on her bed, touches her clothed breasts, and her boyfriend finds them and they stop. A woman cheering for a figure skater takes off her top and yells (we see her in her bra and jeans). A man wearing a bathrobe (his bare chest is visible) is surrounded by two women who caress him, and he kisses one of the women. We see the cover of an adult videotape that features a man with two women caressing his legs. A man wears jockey shorts and a T-shirt (we see bare thighs), a man takes off his clothing to his jockey shorts, and a man is bare-chested with a towel wrapped around his hips. A woman wears a low-cut top that reveals cleavage.
 A man holds another man in the air over his head, with his hand on his crotch, while skating. A man holds another man upside down and their faces are in each other's crotches. Two men dance together, and then several men dance together.
 A man and a woman kiss tenderly, and the man tells the woman that his friend (a man) taught him "some stuff," when she remarks about how he has been practicing. A man in a sex addicts meeting tells other participants about a situation he found himself in, and a few of them become aroused (they breathe heavily, they caress their chests and legs, etc.). A man and a woman flirt on the telephone and are fed suggestive lines by other people who are in their respective rooms.
 A man talks about his sexual conquests. A man asks another man if he had sex with a woman. Song lyrics refer to "lady humps," and song lyrics include "stroke me, stroke me," while a man skates and makes sexual gestures with his hands and hips. A man says, "I am a sex addict," and using crude terms tells a woman that she has aroused him. After a man finishes his skating routine he tells another skater "that's how babies are made," and he then tells the audience, "Let's have a smoke. Was it good for you?" A man calls another man who is skating, "sex on ice." A reference is made to "Euro porn." A man says, "I wanna wear the gold medal naked."
 There are sexual undertones in a brother and sister relationship, and when they skate they use suggestive moves. A man lies on a bearskin rug and strikes a suggestive pose. A man skates and grabs his crotch.
 A man in a jail cell with several other men pulls his pants down and sits on a toilet (we see his bare thighs); he then asks another man for "help." A man pulls off his jock strap from under his clothing, and he uses it to slide down a tether and onto the floor below (he throws it to women in the audience, one smells it and screams for him).

VIOLENCE/GORE 6 - We see a skating routine where a woman is thrown in the air, her partner kicks his foot in the air and when the woman lands, her head falls off (we see the head separate, roll on the ice, blood spurts on the ice and the woman's leg twitches).
 A man is struck on the head by a man with a metal pipe (we see a bloody bruise on his forehead later).
 A man shoots a skating mascot with a crossbow (the arrow lodges in the mascot's well padded cheek).
 A man jumps over a bridge, and crashes into water below breaking through the ice and is then out of sight.
 Two men bicker while standing on a podium, they shove each other, one falls onto ice, one head-butts the other (we see a bloody mouth and nose), and one falls knocking down a flame that ignites a nearby mascot. A man throws another man while skating and he crashes into crates. A man throws another man while skating and he crashes into the ice and the rink wall.
 A man slides on his bare stomach on ice (we see bloody scratches on his chest later. A man is cut on the leg by a skate (the blade tears his pant leg; there's no blood). A man trips on a pearl that was thrown onto the ice, and he breaks his ankle and screams from the pain.
 A woman slaps a man in the face, and he slaps her in the face.
 Two men slip while stretching and kick each other in the crotch. A man skates on his bare feet and complains of how cold it is.
 A woman handcuffs a man to a toilet pipe in a public restroom. A man is tied to a chair and left in a room.
 A man who stalks a figure skater threatens to kill him in several scenes and says, "I wanna cut off your skin and wear it to my birthday party." A man says that his father had him circumcised on his 10th birthday to reduce wind resistance. Siblings blame their sister for their parents being killed in a car crash. We hear that a mother and father died in a car crash. A woman says that she would like to "skate over their throats," about a competitor. A man tells another man, "I am gonna pop you in the back of the head."
 A man drinks alcohol to the point of inebriation before his performance in a children's skating show and in one of these scenes he uses obscene terms and vomits in his costume and out of it (we see goo and hear him gagging).
 A man leaves his adopted adult son on the side of a snowy road and tells him that he is disowning him.
 A man handcuffed to a toilet pipe uses his tongue to pull dirty toilet paper along the floor to retrieve a key.

PROFANITY 4 - 5 obscene hand gestures, 35 sexual references, 14 scatological terms, 22 anatomical term, 14 mild obscenities, name-calling (lame, moron, idiot, daddy's boy, crazy), 1 religious profanity, 6 religious exclamations. [profanity glossary]

SUBSTANCE USE - A woman takes what are supposed to be prescription drugs while doing a skating routine (to demonstrate how someone might have committed suicide). A man drinks a lot of alcohol from a bottle and appears drunk in several scenes, a man says, "I was hammered," a man drinks a beer and then breaks a bottle of alcohol open and drinks from it. A man says, "I was on Quaaludes."

DISCUSSION TOPICS - Orphanages, adoption, sports training, competition, cheating, failure, success, guilt, obsession, friendship, homosexuality, dreams, incest, suicide, drug overdose, John F. Kennedy and Marilyn Monroe, sexually transmitted diseases, jealousy, sex addiction, fear.

MESSAGE - Working as a team can make anything possible. The show must go on.

Special Keywords: S6 - V6 - P4 - MPAAPG-13

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A CAVEAT: We've gone through several editorial changes since we started covering films in 1992 and some of our early standards were not as stringent as they are now. We therefore need to revisit many older reviews, especially those written prior to 1998 or so; please keep this in mind if you're consulting a review from that period. While we plan to revisit and correct older reviews our resources are limited and it is a slow, time-consuming process.

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